Nothing else matters.

Goodness gracious I am so easily distracted! It's a very frustrating thing to me.
Today I went into church totally distracted and thinking about all the things I need to get done or the things that are frustrating me about life. Church was awesome and put me in my place. Helping me see that all these THINGS and TASK that consume my thoughts really shouldn't matter. All that's important is my devotion to the Lord . . . within EVERYTHING. I am often so concerned with the house, the to do list, my parenting, my wants, my failures, what people think, THINGS that others have, THINGS that I don't have . . . see a theme here? Basically, complete and total inward thinking.

Argh! And guess what happens when I get out in the parking lot of church? I start looking at someone elses nice fancy van and I want it. I get home and I step into a messy house and I stress about it. I daily argue with God about all these things including how uncomfortable and humbling it is to be pursuing adoption.

When it's so obvious how much I NEED Him, why do I so often live as though I don't? I'm so thankful that these are usually only moments in the day. I'm thankful for His Word that leads me back to where I should be. It comes down to the fact that someday I will be standing in front of HIM. When I get to heaven do I want Him to comment on how great my house was or how fancy my van was or how much money was in my bank account or how great I was at daily conquering my to do list . . . ? I hope not! I hope He points out times when He provided for me, when He helped me obey, when His opinion meant more then mans to me, when He gave courage and strength to pursue something greater then ourselves . . . ! 

We probably all have things in our lives that we find it just plain hard to obey in. He so desires us to run to Him. Not get ourselves organized and then come to Him. No, run to Him. Jason and I are learning this a lot lately. We'll be in an argument or in the midst of craziness and confusion, and we are slowly be surely learning to just stop, hold hands and PRAY! It is amazing the power prayer has even when you don't have the words or just don't feel like it. God knows our hearts. He sees us. He wants us to REST in Him!

I'm so grateful for the fact that He's never changing! One moment my sinful nature can come out or I'm totally distracted by THINGS around me, but God's forgiveness allows me to come back to Him again and SEE how much I REALLY NEED HIM! I must preach the gospel to myself many times a day in order to allow myself to be affective for Him! Nothing else matters in the end except what will continue on into heaven. My house, my stuff, my crossed of list . . . those THINGS will pass away.