This last week we decided that we would take the next step in the adoption process and choose the agency we would apply for. We're going with MLJ Adoptions. Or at least we are applying with them. The application is sitting right now in front of me. I need to make copies, write the check, and get it in the mail Monday morning. The amount of money that has to be sent in with the application is doable for us. The next amount . . . well, not so much. This is where God is going to be stretching our faith. Already He has giving us support from our parents and this last week support from our kids (as best as a 6 and 4 year old can understand and give. Something I was specifically praying for!) and countless support and prayers from a lot of other people watching this journey.
Now we need His financial support. I know He can provide if He wants to. I'm hoping He wants to, but more so, I'm hoping that I want what He wants no matter the outcome. We cannot make God do anything other then what is already in His plans for us. I want to be a part of what He is doing, not let Him be a part of what we're doing. The amount of money needed for an adoption is insane. There's a few big chunks of money that we will need before we can even begin to apply for adoption grants and such. It's overwhelming and really easy to think that it could never happen, but we cannot put limitations on God.
Another big thing that has happened is that we have decided to try for two children. Yes, we're crazy. I hope you're all good enough at math to add 3 + 2. If you're not, that equals 5!!! Yep, there's a possibility that someday we will be Papa and Momma to 5 kids! Anyone who knows my huge faults knows that God is really going to have to use my weaknesses for His glory. I'm daily saying to myself, "I don't know how I'm going to do this." Followed by a kick in the pants from Jason, " You're right, you're not going to be able to do this. God is." OKAY.
Our decision to seek two orphans is for many reasons, but mostly transition reasons. Can you imagine how scary it might be to not only leave everything you've ever known but then also to join a family of blond hair, blue eyed, pasty white weirdos when you're the only beautifully brown skinned one? (have you figured out that our heart is in Africa? Although I won't say here from where specifically until I know it's ok.) So on our application we put that we are interested in a boy ages 2-5 and a girl ages 0-3 and hoping for siblings but we are obviously fine with non-related.
So you can imagine that my week started out with, "God what are you doing to me?" The question was no longer should we pursue adopting a child, but should we pursue adopting TWO children. Whoa. Just so you know, we aren't as crazy as our friends the Lee's who are adopting THREE children at once! God is working! It's crazy. Crazy beautiful! Jen and I have already said that we will need to stock up on hair dye, coffee, and lots chocolate . . . and of course be armed with God's strength and not our own! By the way, if you are interested in adoption, Jen's site has a wealth of knowledge. She's been a great help to me!
Then mid week I had a few days of discouragement in regards to my human weaknesses as a mom and our HUGE financial hurdles. Then Wednesday night Jason wanted to be out at the church for the family ministry, D6, a little early cause it was his first week to start helping with the junior high ministry, 180. We got our kiddos in their D6 classes, Jason went off to 180, and I went up the the equipping room for the parents time. No one was there yet so I grabbed a seat and thanked the Lord for the downtime. I hadn't gotten to read my Bible all day and prayed for God to help me change my discouraged perspective. I don't usually randomly pick something in the Bible to read unless I have just extra time. And it is usually the Psalms, cause they just rock! So I randomly opened up to Psalms 146. THANK YOU GOD!
Here it is!
Psalm 146
1 Praise the Lord!
Let all that I am praise the Lord.
2 I will praise the Lord as long as I live.
I will sing praises to my God with my dying breath.
3 Don’t put your confidence in powerful people;
there is no help for you there.
4 When they breathe their last, they return to the earth,
and all their plans die with them.
5 But joyful are those who have the God of Israel as their helper,
whose hope is in the Lord their God.
6 He made heaven and earth,
the sea, and everything in them.
He keeps every promise forever.
7 He gives justice to the oppressed
and food to the hungry.
The Lord frees the prisoners.
8 The Lord opens the eyes of the blind.
The Lord lifts up those who are weighed down.
The Lord loves the godly.
9 The Lord protects the foreigners among us.
He cares for the orphans and widows,
but he frustrates the plans of the wicked.
The Lord will reign forever.
He will be your God, O Jerusalem, throughout the generations.
Praise the Lord!
Need I say more? Nope.
4 comments:
I just love this! All of it. I'm so excited to watch and be a part of your growing family. :)
You are amazing! I'm humbled to be on this journey with you. Love you.
Okay, just read this post. Cracked me up! And made me EXCITED that you are going for two officially (I wasn't sure). Glad that we can be crazy together. I added your blog to my google reader so I'll be following regularly now.
Thank you for the encouragement. We struggle with being discouraged about the financial aspect and kind of feeling alone here in Sioux City. We're searching for other adoptive families in the city but adoption is just not a priority in our church. Sad, right? So, pray for us as we pray for you! )
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